we are back

So I have a computer as of last night and will get way better about updating the blog. Ava and I are also back from our week adventure to North Carolina. Ava was amazing the entire trip. Beginning with playing happily in my lap for the two and half hour flight to NC in a middle seat to the drive back to our house from the airport after we landed in Dallas. She likes adventures and you really could see her taking everything in. It was like a light bulb went off... Keegan was so sad when I would tell him all the new things that she did while we were away. From laying down when I need to change her, to saying a bunch of new words.... bird, balloon, ball, baby, go go go, pops, mama, and bed. She started to understand many more things... for example I would say go give this to granny and off she went to the other end of the house and would give my mom her glasses. Or when she woke up at 6am and I said it was not time to get up still time for bed (thank god it was a rainy day and was really dark outside) she lied down and stroked her little head until she fell asleep. She is becoming such a little person. It was an emotional trip. My step mom who was way more then just a step mom to me and my brother and sister moved to Pennsylvania to start a new life and well it just is not home without them there. I have many conflicting emotions about the whole situation that do not belong on a blog but life is complicated and nothing is forever and you have to do what it takes to make you happy I guess and communicate how you feel and what you need. I also think family is family. But Ava really got me through. She became such a lover, passing out kisses when she felt they were needed and resting her cheek against other peoples for a long period of time, sighing loudly, giggling, trying to show off a new skill or something she loved, sharing, or anytime I would get sad and cry which i tried to hide from ava she rubbed my shoulder or something sweet to comfort me it happened once and I don't think she really saw tears... well maybe but hopefully she is not scared for life. It was the sweetest thing ever. soon I will get the camera up and running on my new computer too. never had a desk top before. i like it.